By Jamie Moon
The following series of articles are based on and excerpted from my book Deep Soul Cleansing, with additional comments for the purpose of this conversation.
When we come to these many Programs or treatment centers we find ourselves to be powerless. So, what exactly does that mean? “They told me lack of power was my dilemma and that there is a solution.”[i] “Our human resources, as marshaled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly. Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Obviously. But where and how were we to find this power?”[ii] We find this “Lack of Power” in three major problem areas in our lives:
A. LACK OF POWER—IN OUR ADDICTION(S) or Obsessions of the Mind (whatever our so-called primary may be—alcohol, drugs, food, people, sex, etc.) It doesn’t seem to matter what it is, most of us find we quit one and another rears its ugly head. There have been many Groups grow out of the original Program but there is really only one 12 Step Program with many applications.
B. LACK OF POWER—IN RELATIONSHIPS—In Three Areas of Life—People, Places and Things, and most importantly, our relationship with God. “My basic problem was a spiritual hunger.”[iii] For example, alcohol is called ‘spirits’ for a very good reason; it fills the hole where God goes. This hunger is fed by first dealing with our other relationships, which automatically heals our relationship with God. (1) “Nothing can be more demoralizing than a clinging and abject dependence upon another human being.”[iv] (2) Then of course, “We have also seen men and women who go power-mad, who devote themselves to attempting to rule their fellows.”[v] These people are just as dependent on their victims as those dependent ones. It has been said that “if one would scratch the surface of an addict we would find a co-dependent underneath.” We think that before co-dependence was ever isolated as a problem it was well defined in the phrase (3) “a frightened human being determined to depend completely upon a stronger person for guidance and protection.”[vi] Within these three quotes one finds the co-dependent dance.
We shall continue with our discussion of our powerlessness over our relationships in the next article.
[i] Alcoholics Anonymous – Page 510.1 – 4th Edition
[ii] Alcoholics Anonymous – Page 45.1-2
[iii] Alcoholics Anonymous – Page 546.2 – 4th Edition
[iv] As Bill Sees It – Page 72.1
[v] Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions – Page 45.2 – British Edition
[vi] Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions – Page 44.4 – British Edition